THE WEEK THAT WAS | 2018 – Week 3: January 15-21
Disclaimer: Long post. Includes a long rant. Read at your own risk.
This week we almost bounced back. But that was before we hit rock bottom. Wanting to play at 2 AM does seem it, and it’s a pretty cruel joke if there’s anything worse than THAT. Oh wait, there is.
I appreciate the sentiment, I really do. But there’s a fine line between concern and coming off as a know-it-all.
Imagine this, okay? It’s a wild possibility, I know, but just consider this hypothetical situation that I might be just as concerned about MY OWN CHILD as you are, if not more. Does that seem possible at all? It does, right?
Secondly, let’s assume something equally wild – that I know my child better than others do. Outlandish, right? But hey, truth is stranger than fiction. 🤷
You might think I have gone crazy because I’m ranting, but here’s what I’m going off about…
It becomes very hard for me to take someone seriously when they go to lengths to protect their identity only so they can pass judgements on others and not be judged themselves. And imagine how much free time this woman has. No wonder she can spend 2 hours at the park every day and come home to eat food (that I will assume someone else cooks for her because she has not mentioned that she cooks.)
I know toddlers need to be tired to sleep well. And I know this person meant well. But you see, when I talk about “The week that was”:
- I’m sharing , not complaining. This activity is a part of documenting our life, so it’s more for me than for others. Thank you for reading, but it’s really okay if you don’t. This is more for mommies who are going through the same thing I am so we can all pat each other on the shoulder and say, “There, there!” and offer each other a hot beverage. (If you got the reference, let me know 😉)
- If I want advice I will ask for it.
I have an extremely active child who runs around the house ALL DAY and ironically does NOT when we are outdoors. Then, she wants to be carried, but at home she’ll run around everywhere, climb on everything, pull everything out of her shelf, and even move furniture around the house.
Watching her intently so she doesn’t get hurt and picking up after her multiple times a day leaves me so tired that at the end of the day that I have just about enough energy to eat my dinner and slump into bed. If I have a little more energy, I manage to read a bit rather than have to run after her on the street (no parks close by, sorry) or carry her around. Not to mention that her feeding/pooping/sleeping timing is so perfect that when it’s the ideal time to step out she’s either in the middle of her nap or has just woken up or is sleepy or hungry or needs a diaper change or all at the same time, which mind you, I have to tend to alone. I don’t have a nanny, we don’t live with either of our parents, so it’s pretty much up to me to hold the fort down most of the day, so to speak.
So such suggestions without having complete information about my situation are… presumptuous, to put it mildly.
Here’s some more information, just to clear things up a bit. On most days, I manage the the baby alone from the time she wakes up till she goes to bed. On some days her father is around when she has her breakfast or during dinner time, and rarely on both occasions. So between being the all-round caregiver for my child, I also manage to cook (one main meal for the whole family and two little additional meals for the child), do a few house chores, work on my blog, try to entertain and engage with my child without having to rely on electronics (but I do give in at least once on most days) and try to take care of myself. Sometimes I don’t remember to drink water, I don’t get to go to the bathroom when I want to, and the only reason I eat meals on time is because we follow Baby Led Weaning and the baby is now eating family food.
But what I am really trying to say, is that no matter what, my baby’s needs come first and she’s fed, cleaned, and rested, even if I am not, especially when I am NOT, because I need her to be calm and relaxed so I can take a break.
In the midst of this if I do find an extra hour or so when she’s awake, rather than running after her in unknown territory, I run after her inside the house and of course no one has seen it because I cannot record EVERYTHING. So while it is possible for some moms to take their child outside to the park to play for 1.5-2 hours every day, it’s a bit difficult for me. And hey, if this said mom also works from home and manages the house and BOTH her kids without any help, then I’d love a few more details tips and an hourly break down of her day and schedule, because clearly, you’re doing it better than I am. So preach away.
But before that, here’s even more information. We have enough common sense to keep the light turned off because we like our own sleep too. The light is turned on only when we give up after around an hour of trying to get her to go back to sleep and decide to let her play and tire herself out.
Also, my child isn’t an insomniac. My child isn’t lethargic. It’s just that her body clock is off. Instead of sleeping at 9 PM-ish and beginning her day early – around 7 AM-ish, her schedule is off by 2-2.5 hours, which makes it difficult for us to sleep on time and then wake up early. Maybe it is some kind of sleep regression where she’s dropping a nap, as I’ve already mentioned before this. Maybe it is something totally different. But it’s not that she’s not tired enough.
Add to that her third tooth that was cutting through last week and you have a child who isn’t sleeping well. She wakes up crying and in pain and because her sleep is disrupted she can’t go back to sleep, so she ends up playing for a bit and unfortunately for us, it is around 2 or 3 AM when that happens. And that’s okay because it is a part of growing up. But thank you, dear sanctimommy, for assuming you know the solution to my problem without knowing the cause of the problem or the problem itself.
SPEECH & OTHER MILESTONES
I swear it feels like she does something new every day. From maintaining bullet points in notes on my phone during her first year to now scribbling things down as they happen and filling half an A4 sheet, things are definitely moving at a rapid pace and I hope I can keep up.
The new words in her vocabulary this week are:
- Boo (blue) and ello (yellow). She cannot identify these colours but can repeat the words when we ask her to.
- She can now say “no” in addition to shaking her head, but apparently “bey” and pushing our hand away is more effective when she wants to let us know she’s done eating/drinking.
- She can also “shhhhh” and “tch tch tch”. Thank you, Alpha pup.
The new things she learnt to do this week are:
- Actions for Twinkle Twinkle (she says Teeku Teeku for Twinkle twinkle). She also lifts both her arms up to show ‘Up above the world so high’ while saying, “up-pa”, and by Wednesday or Thursday she also managed to join her fingers to make a diamond.
- She has significantly reduced my work in terms of meal times because she can now almost handle a spoon. She was able to guide a loaded spoon to her mouth when she was around 9 or 10 months old but we didn’t try letting her load the spoon herself. Somehow, this week, I decided to give it a try and voila! She did it. It wasn’t perfect, but she can pick up food from a bowl and guide the spoonful of food to her mouth. What’s even better is that she loves this independence and now, doesn’t like it if we try to spoon-feed her.
- When asked, she can show how one brushes their teeth, eats food, has chai, sleeps, sings (la la la), dances, in addition to the usual, ‘show me how you can clap.’
She can now give proper hugs and because I hold her head in my hands when I hug her and say, “Oh, mera baccha (my baby)”, she also holds my head and says, “Oooooh” when she hugs me. Hugs and kisses that I haven’t had to ask for have become more frequent and I am so, so grateful than in this regard, she’s taken after me.
This little girl also loves cats (and dogs too, I think). This week, during a video call with her maasi (my sister), she put Cleo – one of the cats – in front of the camera and Laddoo kept waving ‘Hi’ to Cleo.
Cleo wasn’t impressed.
PLAYTIME & BOOKS
We have had a little bit of a success with books this week, in the sense that she has allowed me to point at things in the books and tell her what they are. That’s when I managed to teach her to say Boo and Ello.
Of course, she still loves to flip pages but this is a significant improvement over just walking away and looking at another book. By herself. Without me. It was as if she was saying, “Mamma, you read your books and I ‘ll read mine.”
No, wait. That was too polite.
“Stay away from my books, Mamma,” was more like it.
OTHER STUFF THAT HAPPENED THIS WEEK
- In a beautiful déjà vu that took me back to summer last year, this little girl tried to catch sun rays that hit through our bedroom window. She used to do this last year too when she was little and had learned to roll over. Back then, she played with the rays that used to hit the living room floor and she used to tap on the bright patch on the floor. But now, her excitement and the look on her face when she saw that there was this ray of light coming through was such a joy to watch.
- I met Tamanna and Anchal for a writing session this week. Inspired by the writing marathons that happen for NaNoWriMo, I thought it’d be a good idea if I had company to just sit and write. So I met up with these two lovely ladies and we typed, talked, and had had a good time, just us.
- I caught her doing a little jugaad of her own. We’ve extended the string on her pull along dog and I found her with the string hanging around her neck which meant she was basically pulling the toy along but hands-free. Smart, eh?
- Going to the loo has been a bit of a struggle for me. If she spots me, that is, which is ALWAYS because I cannot risk closing the door. And if I’m in there a bit longer, then this happens.
ON SOCIAL MEDIA
On Mrs. Writes-a-Latte
A-Z in 100 Words Challenge – Week 3 – C for Clear
Schooled #1 | Faux Pas – Redundant Words in Everyday Phrases
That’s all for now. I’ll see you all again, soon.